.. probably the "darkest" one i have ever written.
Sometimes writing down your feelings is basically just "therapy". Im not sure *why* im posting this one because at the time it was very real to me. For various reasons, I had been having a very bad year and, oddly, this "poem" signalled the end of all the bad stuff. I guess that im hoping that someone can read this and if they are feeling the same, if they can relate, then id like to think that it can help in some way.
I actually wrote it down on a napkin at a restaurant while waiting for some people to arrive. It is written here *exactly* as i wrote it then. As with most of my stuff, i dont edit - its all written straight from the brain (or heart/soul) onto the paper.
The worms of paranoia grow,
Crawling, burrowing through the mind.
Eating away everything good,
Still crawling, still burrowing.
Destroying the whole,
Leaving a dark space,
A hollow vacuum.
The darkness grows,
Filling the void with bad things.
Mistrust and loathing,
Fear and loneliness,
Nowhere to turn, a different person awakes.
The awareness intensifies,
Sounds, colours, smells are sharper.
More animal than human.
People everywhere, all strangers.
Who are they?
What do they want from me?
Why do they care for me?
More feelings from the void,
Vision through a twisted clarity.
Fight, maim, run.
Sanity returns slowly.
Purity, goodness, spirit.
Slowly, mind and body whole.
Safe, rational, alive.
hmmm.. yes.. is it me, or is that all a bit pretentious?
im rather pleased with "Vision through a twisted clarity" though, not bad considering i was a gibbering wreck at the time ROFL!